“7 Reasons For Divorce In Marriage”; a “Beyond Divorce Academy Series With Gabriel Onyekawa” Blog post. Also revealing 7 Reasons Many Marriages End In Divorce
Recently, it seems that marriages are collapsing and lovers are going their separate ways. Many Marriages End In Divorce. But, it shouldn’t be so! Berger (2021) noted that approximately 45% of marriages still end in divorce in the United States. Warren (2021), on her own, disclosed that the percentage of divorce in United States alone is not 45% but 50%. The blogger further stated that couples usually divorce in the first seven years of their marriage. However, the essence of this blog is not to investigate into the exact year most marriages are divorced but to find out the most common causes of divorce in marriage.
Now, let’s examine the 7 most common reasons for divorce in most marriages:
This is also known as “extramarital affair”. The Scripture said that marriage is honourable when the bed is undefiled. Until you are defiled, you can’t be destroyed. When one partner goes outside of the relationship for sexual intercourse, the destiny of such a marriage would automatically hang precariously at the mercy of the other partner and his/her people and cultural believes. Of course, it would remain seemingly difficult for trust to be restored in such relationship because the scars of the ‘wound’ would always be there. That is why you should do your best and keep your legs closed as a married woman. And for the men, always remember, your ‘gbola’, ‘obrokos’ ‘penis’ is not educated, hold it tight. Never allow it to lead you into temptation. “Flee from all appearances of seduction for they are bound to end in adultery”. Research has it that Extra-marital affairs are responsible for the 20-40% breakdown of most marriages and end in divorce. This is one of the most common causes of divorce. No matter your reason for divorce, it is not justified! Infidelity is indeed one of the major reason many marriages end in divorce.
Second to infidelity as a major cause of divorce among marriages is financial challenges. While promoting one of bestselling books, “Beyond Marital Deceit…7 Questions You Need To Answer Before Saying, ‘I do!’”, I met a woman who disdained marriage and talked ill of marriage. I decided to have a heart-to-heart chat with her. Not too long, she revealed that she was already divorcing the husband because he has no money. I tried to convince her that being broke is not enough reason to divorce your partner in marriage but her heart was made up. Warren (2021) disclosed in her blog post that according to divorce statistics, a “final straw” reason for divorce is a lack of compatibility in the financial arena and causes almost 41% of divorce. Nonetheless, I am of the view that financial factors are not enough reasons for divorce. Who knows; the reason God brought you in marriage with your ‘broke’ partner is for you to educate him/her financially and add value to his/her financial life. My book entitled, “Blending Hearts… …Everything You Need to Know about Establishing a Sustainable Marriage” would add more value to this discourse. Check it out!
Lack of communication
According to Warren (2021), “Poor communication is one of the biggest reasons for 65% of divorces”. Lack of communication seems subtle but strong enough to spark the fire of divorce in marriage. My little experience taught me that couples no longer cheat on their partners physically alone but most often, they cheat on them digitally. Imagine a situation where partners in marriage take their phones to bed at night. At first value, it delimits the frequency of their communication. In addition, in most cases, the man would be chatting with a lady out there, same with the lady. No thanks to the digital world. But, you can avoid this! Spend quality time together always with your partner. Always chat with him/her occasionally. This is bound to add credence to your marital destiny.
Poor Sexual Performance
This factor seems to be the cardinal reason for opting to divorce among the female folks. Most women think that their men (partners) are not man enough. But, they forget that their own “thing” might be the challenge. What happens when the cunt of a lady is ‘oversize’? What happens when the only thing a wife knows in sex and marriage is the ‘old school way of making love’? Mutuality of sexuality is a factor to be considered in marriage too. Don’t allow this factor ruin your marriage. You can work it out with your lover (your partner). Nothing shall deter your relationship! Not even sex!
Show me a man without vision and I will show you a marriage without direction. Any marriage without vision lacks direction; of course, difficulty in attracting provision seems to become the order of the day. The world is a man’s world (Genesis 1: 26-28). Women are help-meet created for the men. God gives vision to the men. And He creates women to support the vision. Therefore, where there is no vision, the marriage collapse. This is because such a marriage will lack direction, provision, and sustenance.
In marriage, when one of the partners becomes depressed, he/she is bound to nag and get annoyed at every slightest provocation. Such is marriage is geared towards divorce without knowledge. Depression kills faster than virus. It can even make one commit suicide. You can’t be depressed and be successful. This is because material possession and related accumulations would amount to nothing sequel to your depression. Learn to talk things over with your partner. And as a partner, create listening ears at all times for your partner. This is bound to serve as a succor to his/her depression. Motivate and inspire your partner. Do not talk down on him/her.
Unpreparedness For Marriage
Winnie (2021) noted that a surprising number of 75.0% of couples of all ages have blamed not being prepared for married life for the demise of their relationship. Divorce rates are highest among couples in their 20s. Lack of preparation is one of the most common reasons for divorce. Almost half the divorces occur in the first 10 years of marriage, especially between the fourth and eighth anniversary. Thus, divorce is seemingly inevitable when couples are not emotionally, physically, psychologically, socially, educationally, mentally, spiritually, and financially prepared for marriage. How many books and resource materials did you read before wedding your spouse?